College Roommate Tips

Dealing With An Incompatible Roommate

By Ashley Paskill

Even if you spend days or weeks searching for the perfect roommate and you are convinced that you found the one, things may not be so perfect once you actually start living together. Whether you live in a dorm or an apartment, your space will likely be on the smaller side, and living in tight quarters with others can prove to be a challenge. If you and your roommates end up not being as compatible as it seemed you would be, there are things you can do to ensure that you all make it to the end of the semester without going completely crazy.

Communication is key

While it may be tempting to give your roommates the silent treatment if you end up not liking them, it is best to communicate, especially when issues arise. If you live with other roommates, do not talk about the roommate you do not like behind their back as this could cause further issues. When you talk to the person, be direct yet respectful. Ask your roommate(s) if there is anything you can do to help make the living situation better on your end. Listening is just as important, if not more so, than talking in order to help communication stay open.

As soon as you sense that things are getting a bit tense, arrange a time where you can have a conversation with your roommate. Consider meeting at a restaurant or coffeehouse. Be honest about how you have been feeling without pointing fingers. It is possible that your roommate might be dealing with stress and does not realize how they have been acting. However, if they are acting how they are because they genuinely do not like you, make a plan for how to move forward.

Other tips to help communication improve is to avoid hiding behind a computer or cell phone to have the conversation and to avoid being passive-aggressive when discussing your concerns. Also, initially, keep the conversation one-on-one. If things are not improving or get worse, you may opt to bring a neutral person in, but only do this if things do not get better.

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Avoid political conversations

Many incompatibility issues may stem from differences in political opinions. It is important to meet people with different views in order to learn, these differences become difficult if your roommate is unable to agree to disagree on issues or becomes demeaning of your views. If you do find yourself having an argument about politics with your roommate, do not take their opinions personally. Try your best to stay calm, avoid cursing, and find things that you can agree on. Ideally, you should try to avoid political conversations if you know they will cause major disagreements and fights.

Set boundaries and enforce them

Boundaries are always important, but they are especially crucial if you end up disliking your roommate. Creating a roommate agreement with rules to follow, such as guidelines for having people over and personal space, is a great way to enforce boundaries. The agreement can be amended if new issues arise, but the guidelines should be followed for the most part. Create set times for studying and figure out how you are splitting room and utility costs. Make a chart that maps out who is responsible for what chores and when they need to get done. Set up consequences for times when these guidelines are not upheld by you or your roommate.

One boundary that you may want to enforce is borrowing each other’s stuff and eating each other’s food. If these have been one of the causes of the problems, you may want to enforce rules such as not borrowing things, especially without asking, and not eating the other person’s food. Reducing the issues you have to deal with can make living with a difficult roommate that much easier. Include these rules in your roommate agreement so that you have them in writing in case you need to reference them later.

Once you set boundaries, make sure you are actually abiding by them. If you yourself are not living up to your rules and boundaries, you should not expect your roommate to. Do to others as you would want to be done to you, as the golden rule states, and it is very true in the case of dealing with a difficult roommate. Even if your roommate refuses to follow the rules and boundaries, you can rest assured that you are holding up your end of the deal.

Be respectful

You may not like your roommate, but you are stuck with them for the time being. Things will be much easier for both of you if you agree to respect each other, even if you are not the biggest fans of each other. Remember that you will not be roommates forever, so hang in there and try your best to not be a terrible person. Say hi, keep them updated on friends coming over, and do your share of the chores. This will help you survive until you can move out and find a new place and new roommates. Resist the urge to just give up and not care about your side of the rent and the chores, as this will shine a bad light on you. Keep your space clean, especially if you know that your roommate needs cleanliness.

Get another party involved

Sometimes, getting a neutral party involved can be useful in figuring out how to move forward. It may be your landlord or Resident Assistant, or even a campus counselor. Getting an unbiased opinion can help you and your roommate manage the situation of not getting along, or they may be able to help you figure out how to get out. If you have a roommate agreement, share it with whoever your unbiased person is so they can keep you accountable and step in when issues arise. Try to avoid asking family members or friends to be the third party as they may be biased toward whoever they are related to or are closest to.

That said, you should be careful of who you bring in and when. See if there are ways that you can help smooth the situation over on your own. Also, be sure that the person you bring in is neutral and does not favor one of you over the other. Be cautious of who you tell even before bringing someone else in, and take any advice from family and friends with a grain of salt. Close friends and relatives are likely going to see you in a positive light and point fingers at your roommate. This may seem comforting in the moment, but if there is something you need to do differently in order to make things better, you need to hear that side.

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Be willing to compromise

Being in a disagreement where you and your roommate are polar opposites and things seem impossible to resolve can be tough. However, if you show that you are willing to compromise and meet somewhere in the middle, it is likely that your roommate will follow suit. While it may not be the most ideal situation, meeting in the middle allows you and your roommate to each get a bit of what you want while helping to end the disagreement. Showing that you are willing to work together to solve the problem can help the situation be better.

When you talk to your roommate, you may discover that they are having trouble keeping their space clean or keeping on top of their chores because of mental health issues or life problems in general. While you may not want to take on extra work, offer to help them when they do their chores and try to be understanding. It is likely that your campus has mental health resources that you can refer them to so they can get the help they need. Being willing to compromise may mean taking on some extra chores to help them through their tough time, but set a time limit so they do not keep taking advantage of this offer.

Stay calm

Dealing with roommate issues is stressful, but it is better to handle the problems when you are level-headed. If your roommate does something and you get angry, walk away, and take some time to calm down. Confronting your roommate while you are still angry can cause you to say things that you may regret and can cause issues down the line. Being calm will help you explain yourself in a way that makes sense and does not necessarily point fingers at your roommate. If you feel yourself getting upset when talking to your roommate, take a few deep breaths and try your best to keep your cool.

Do not wait for things to worsen

You may not feel like the issues you are facing are bad enough to address them with your roommate, but things will only get worse as you continue putting them off. If you wait too long, you or your roommate are likely to explode in anger and frustration. As soon as issues arise, make a point to address them. It may be tempting to ignore the problem, especially if you and your roommate are both busy, but it is much better to address issues as they arise so things can get resolved. That way, you are less likely to have feelings of dread when interacting with your roommate.

Be willing to change

While it may be tempting and easy to point fingers at your roommate as being the problem, but if your roommate brings something up that has been bothering them about how you have acted, you need to be willing to change to help make things better. It can be difficult to see faults in yourself, but nobody is perfect. Being willing to change your thoughts and habits can help ease any tension that exists between you and your roommate. Also, do not expect your roommate to think and behave the same way you do. Everyone is different, and one of the points of college is to learn about ways of thinking that are different from yours. Keep your differences in mind as you are navigating any issues that may arise so that you can know how your roommate may respond and what your roommate is willing to do. Keeping an open mind is a crucial skill in many areas of life, and this is one way to practice it.

Spend time with others

You may be tempted to spend all of your time outside of class with your roommate, but if you are having issues getting along, it is important that you give each other space. Find some new friends to spend time with, and do activities that do not require being in your apartment with your roommate. Explore the city or town you live in and see things you have not been to yet. Try new restaurants and shop at local stores. Go to campus events and join a student organization. Getting out of your apartment and branching out to meet new people can give you new perspectives and help you navigate any issues that may arise with your roommate.

Hang in there

It may seem like time is moving super slowly, but remember that this situation will not last forever. Try to make the most of the situation by having a sense of humor. If things are truly bad, see if there is a way you can move out or get a different roommate. Remember that college is about learning, and part of that is learning about new people. Having a roommate is a unique experience, so make note of any lessons you learn through the struggle you face. Also, remember that tough times help make you stronger. It is frustrating when you are going through it, but once you get through it, you will be able to look back and be proud of all you have been through.

Dealing with an incompatible roommate may seem impossible to survive, but the situation will not last forever. You will get through it and you will be proud of how strong you are when you reflect on the situation.

Evicting a Roommate: What to Know

By Kaitlin Hurtado

Whether you are rooming with your best friend or a complete stranger, living with roommates is far from a breeze. Some type of conflict is bound to occur when you are living with roommates, from small arguments over whose turn it is to wash the dishes to larger situations where you can’t stand being in the same space as one another. Some conflicts may be resolved quickly with an apology, but some situations may need something more serious, or permanent, like a roommate moving out.

Unfortunately, you may find yourself facing the choice of evicting a roommate due to a conflict that just won’t be solved. Depending on the situation, eviction may be your only option and you may very well not know how to go about handling evicting a roommate. Keep reading to learn more about navigating evicting a roommate.

Photo: Pexels

Explore your options

When you have any negative feelings toward your roommate, your go-to thought may be just to give them the boot. It may seem like the easiest option — making them go away would mean that all the issues tied to them will automatically go away. However, eviction may not be your best option, especially if you haven’t considered the other options you have for dealing with your roommate issues.

First, assess the conflict between you and your roommate. Try to look at the situation with all personal feelings taken out. Is the root of the situation really just a matter of multiple small arguments that have been left unattended, and have escalated into the situation you are facing now? Try to talk matters out. Sometimes a situation can be fixed with clear and effective communication between roommates that leads to a compromise that works for everyone. In these cases, eviction can be avoided.

These compromises may be a new cleaning schedule, a new schedule for who gets access to parking spaces, amended roommate agreements on your guest policy, and so on.

Unfortunately, not all roommate issues can be solved this easily and eviction can likely be your only available solution.

Check your leases

If you are living together, you most likely all have signed the same lease. While some may have the opportunity to sign individual leases, so that each person is liable for paying their own rent each month and adhering to the policies outlined in the lease, most are equally accountable once the lease is signed. So if your roommate conflict is because one roommate isn’t paying their monthly rent on time, it puts everyone in jeopardy for violating the lease.

Laws vary from state to state — LifeHacker recommends searching the name of your state and “tenant handbook” on Google to get more information about your rights as a renter in your state. When in doubt, go to your property manager or leasing office to learn more about what you can do in terms of your lease.

If you and your roommate are both on the lease, for example, search for joint or several liability on your lease. If you are jointly liable, you are responsible for paying the full rent regardless of who is paying or how they are paying. You may be paying your rent on time, but your roommate isn’t…and you are still responsible for that unpaid portion. If you’re severally liable, you are liable for your sole portion of the rent. If you are both, you are still responsible for your roommate’s rent but have the legal grounds to sue your roommate for their delinquent rent payment.

If you are co-tenants, you can’t file to evict your roommate, but your landlord can file for eviction. It is important to note that this eviction would appear in public records under both co-tenants’ names, but you can ask your landlord to sign an agreement that releases you from liability if you have been following your lease’s terms. You can file for eviction if you are the master/primary tenant and your roommate is a subtenant. You should have already had your landlord’s permission to sublet to another tenant. Make sure that you are always checking your individual state’s laws to see what rights you have.

Document the conflict

The age-old saying of “Pics or it didn’t happen” can definitely apply in the case of roommate conflicts. Sometimes, it may be a matter of your word against theirs when in an argument, or, when things escalate into a lawsuit. To protect yourself, document the ongoing conflict between you and your roommate.

This does not mean you should install hidden cameras around your apartment to track everything they do, but make sure you are keeping track of the reasons you are evicting your roommate. Are they destructive to the property? Take pictures of the damage they are doing or have done — broken fixtures, messy areas, damaged personal property. These can help you in the event that you need to provide proof for eviction.

If things are getting particularly nasty, such as exchanged threats, be sure to record/screenshot any threats your roommate may be making via text or social media.

Roommate conflicts are never easy, especially if your only solution is likely eviction. With this information in mind, navigating the process of evicting your roommate may be easier.

New Semester, New Roomie: How to Adjust to Getting a New Roommate Mid-Year

By Kailey Walters

With the start of the new semester fast approaching, there are bound to be a few new changes that await you in this new year. One of them might be that you’re getting a new roommate, which could happen for a variety of reasons. Maybe you and your previous roommate didn’t get along very well and mutually agreed to switch. Perhaps you’re going back to campus, but your former roommate has opted to stay at home for the new semester, which leaves a spot open in your dorm. Whatever the case may be, adjusting to a new roommate mid-year might not always be the easiest thing to do — but there are a few ways you can get used to this new roommate and handle the situation well.

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Be open and welcoming.

When you’re first getting to know your new roommate, it’s important that you maintain an open and welcoming attitude toward them. Whether you’re moving into someone else’s dorm or they are moving into yours, the principle of openness remains the same. From your first meeting with your new roommate, you’ll probably be able to gauge what kind of person they are and how interested they are in getting to know you better. From there, you can work toward forming a sort of relationship with them. Of course, this process will work most smoothly if you show with your body language and behavior that you’re very open to getting to know them. So don’t hide yourself away or let yourself become isolated; be as approachable and friendly as possible so that they feel comfortable talking to you.

Try to become friends.

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Once you and your roommate have established some sort of relationship with each other, you can work toward becoming friends. Perhaps it may be a bit disorienting to try to make another new friend in the middle of the school year, especially if you already have an established group of friends, but chances are that it’s not as hard as you think. You two will likely spend a decent amount of time together, so you’ll have plenty of natural opportunities to get to know each other better, talk more, and potentially make plans to hang out.

Of course, if you’re trying your best to become friends with your roommate but it’s not really working out, you don’t have to push it. You’re not meant to become friends with everyone you meet, so it’s not a big deal. As long as you and your roommate are able to maintain a decently civil relationship while you’re living together, that’s the most important thing.

Set boundaries.

As with any roommate relationship, it’s important that you both set boundaries and expectations. Discuss with your roommate what you are comfortable sharing, what chores and responsibilities you each want to have, and anything else that needs to be established in order for your roommate relationship to function well. It may also be helpful to know if either of you is comfortable with having friends over (including how many and at what times of day or night), what time you both wake up and go to sleep, what your class schedules are, and whether you prefer to study and do work in the room or elsewhere, such as the library. Knowing these things can only help your relationship with your roommate, as you will both have clear boundaries and know what to expect from each other.

Plan time to hang out with each other.

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If you and your roommate happen to hit it off, you may want to plan some time to hang out with each other. Intentionally spending time together can help you both adjust to being roommates with one another. The time hanging out will give you the chance to become better friends in a natural setting and do fun things together. It also can be helpful to find some common interests that the two of you share. Perhaps you both love watching the same TV show, or you have similar hobbies like playing badminton. You can use these common interests to find something fun and entertaining for both of you to do.

Have a form of conflict resolution.

Even if you and your roommate get along fairly well, there is still the possibility that you two could end up having a conflict of some sort, which means it’s necessary to have a form of conflict resolution in place. You and your roommate should have a smart, level-headed discussion about the issue so that nobody blows anything out of proportion and so you can come to a reasonable solution.

Adjusting to having a new roommate, even in the middle of the year, doesn’t have to be overly complicated or stressful. Make sure that you maintain a friendly, open posture and work on developing a good relationship with your roommate!

10 Budget-Friendly Gifts to Get Your Roomies for the Holidays

By Victoria Robertson

As the holidays quickly approach, the time to find the perfect gift for your roomies narrows, as does the selection of items in stores. And for a college student on a budget, finding the perfect gift is even more of a struggle.

But not to worry! Rather than panic shopping and selecting an imperfect gift simply because you need to choose something, these 10 budget-friendly gifts to get your roomies for the holidays will give you a great starting off point. So even if you don’t find something on this list that suits everyone on your list, you’ll have plenty of ideas to run with to ensure you’re able to get your shopping done as soon as possible, and with plenty of time to spare!

Photo Via Pixabay

1. Memberships

Why get someone a single present, when you can get them a present every month for the next several months? Gifting your roomie a membership is a great way to remind them that you not only know them well but that you also went above and beyond in getting them the gift that keeps on giving.

Membership plans can be as expensive or inexpensive as you’d like, with 3-month plans being the most inexpensive and 12-month plans being the most expensive. Plus, there is such a wide array of options to choose from when considering a membership for the holidays.

You can opt for food or drinks with a meal kit service or wine delivery service, or you can even opt for monthly coffee delivery services that provide coffees from around the world.

If you want something more unique, there are also services that provide monthly makeup subscriptions, monthly clothing subscriptions, and even monthly book subscriptions. So whatever your roomies’ likes and dislikes, there’s a service for that!

2. Household Goods

Odds are you’ve heard your roomies mention things that they need while going about their day to day lives at your house/apartment/dorm. Rather than brushing these off, start keeping a list of items they need so you can surprise them during the holidays.

Some items may be out of your price range, but the small items needed here and there can make excellent gifts while also showing your roomie that you care and that you’re listening to them.

So whether they simply need a new cast-iron skillet for the kitchen or more picture frames for their bedroom, you’ll not only be on top of it and snag the perfect gift for them, but you’ll also show them how much you care in the process.

3. Books

There’s nothing quite like the smell of a brand new book to join your overflowing shelves. However, note that this gift is not for everyone. If your roommate is an English major, odds are they’re a little tired of reading outside of classes. (Conversely, your roomie may be a giant book nerd and have a long list of upcoming books that they want to get their hands on).

If your roomie is one of the latter, books are a great present during the holiday season. All you need to do to select the perfect book gift is learn about the genre your roomie loves, take a look at some of the works that they currently own, and do a little research.

If all else fails, you can always take a look at the bestseller lists of various outlets, as you’ll ultimately end up finding something that they’ll like, but when in doubt, check their bookshelves out! There are plenty of books out there just waiting for you to find them and share with your roomies this holiday season.

4. Clothes

Everybody needs clothes, and so they are always the perfect holiday gift. That being said, clothes can pose a bit of a challenge, especially if you’re not very close with your roomie (or know their size). While you can never do wrong with a new sweater or some matching pajamas, you can also take a look at your roomie’s wardrobe to get ideas.

Take note of their personal style, the colors they typically wear and the types of clothes they turn to again and again. You can easily replicate some of their favorite pieces in a quick shopping trip, thus avoiding the ever-prominent “taste” problem.

Additionally, you can always ask your roomies what clothing they need. This is a good way to avoid any issues with guessing their sizes and you’ll end up picking out the perfect piece that they actually wanted anyway.

If your roommate is the picky type, you can always take a trip out with them and have them select a few pieces they like, turning around to grab them at a later date. Whatever method works best for you, you’ll end up with the perfect selection of gifts!

5. Alcohol

So long as you and your roommate are of legal drinking age, alcohol is always a solid holiday gift choice, as it allows you to go as expensive or inexpensive as your budget allows.

Simply select the type of alcohol your roommate likes and then shop according to your budget. If you can’t snag alcohol that’s too expensive, you can always spruce the gift up with an additional, complimentary item, such as a drinking game or new glasses.

Conversely, if you’re not interested in buying them alcohol itself, you can always find items like games, drink jewels, and other like items that will be just as cherished for a fraction of the cost.

Basically, this is a simple gift that can feel impersonal, so be sure to add your personal touch to it and take it to that next level!

Infographic Via Canva

6. Binge-Worthy TV Series DVDs

Amidst the pandemic, we’ve all been relying more and more on television to get us through, especially now that winter has hit. Whether rewatching the same old favorites or taking up some new television that we never had time for previously, the amount of TV we’re all watching has definitely increased in the past year. However, many of us don’t have subscriptions to all of the many streaming services out there, and so there might be a few hit shows that we haven’t seen yet.

If you know of any shows your roomie has been dying to see but doesn’t have access to, purchasing some DVD sets of that show is a great way to help them survive the winter.

Again, this can be expensive, so feel free to only select a season or two, or a show with fewer seasons, but there are countless shows out there to select.

Just be sure that you or your roomie have a DVD player! In the age of streaming, many people don’t, so you don’t want to get them a gift that they can’t even use!

7. The Necessities

As previously mentioned, you should always pay attention to what your roommates say they need. While this could mean household goods, you should also take note of whatever else is on their shopping list.

While it’s a lot less fun than going out and selecting something they haven’t thought of, you typically end up saving them money in the long run when buying them the things they need. So if you think they’re going to go out and get it, beat them to the punch! Just be careful not to buy anything they need to quickly, or they may just beat you to the punch and you’ll be without a present for them come the holidays.

It sounds ridiculous, but some people out there really do love getting socks for the holidays, so getting them such things is never a bad idea!

8. Comfy Blanket

Everybody uses them, and everybody loves to get them. Honestly, think of a time that someone has said no to a free blanket, I’ll wait. Yes, we all have many of them lying around, but no, we wouldn’t say we have too many (or even that we have enough).

Comfy and cozy blankets are the perfect gift for the winter, and again, they can be expensive or inexpensive, depending on your budget.

Most people find it helpful to pick these up in person, as you can feel how soft and durable they are in the store. However, if you need to do your shopping online, just be sure to read all of the reviews, as they’ll give you all the details you need to ensure you don’t end up with a cheap gift that feels even cheaper.

Of course, you can always splurge for a brand name blanket that sits atop an armchair as a decorative piece or grab them a snuggie that’s perfect for those roomie movie nights. Regardless of the type of blanket you select, they’ll absolutely love it and use it time and time again!

9. Thoughtful Items

This is the type of item that is going to win you major points when it comes to finding the perfect gift. Anyone can pick up any of the other items on this list, but a thoughtful item specific to the intended recipient truly can’t be beat.

First, you should always consider what your roomie likes. Are they a big fan of a certain show? Are they the library type? What are their interests? You should start here and then begin your shopping.

When in doubt, you can always personalize the gift to them. Whether that means embroidering their name on an item or purchasing a pre-made item that speaks to their interests is up to you. Either way, they’ll be shocked in the best way when they open your gift!

And despite popular belief, thoughtful doesn’t need to mean expensive. The idea here is to show your roomie that you were thinking about them and that you know them well.

Basically, you’ll need to think of a list of things they like or what their interests are and then begin your shopping second, rather than the other way around. This is sure to ensure your gift is specific to them and is one that they’ll instantly fall in love with!

10. Food

Last, but certainly not least, it’s never a bad idea to gift your roomie some food. As previously mentioned, you can always do this via subscription services, but on a more personal level, you can take this a step further and make them a meal.

As college students, it’s no secret that budgets are much tighter than we’d like them to be. For that reason, a home-cooked meal can be done inexpensively, but what it says is so much richer.

Perhaps you select their favorite dish and make it for them, or pick an inexpensive dish and set up a movie night that you can all participate in. You can even get everyone in on it so everyone can bring a dish and you can have a holiday feast.

This option doesn’t have to be expensive (though it can be), it just needs a little pre-planning and heart to go into it. But regardless of how you do it, your roomie is going to love it!

Photo Via Pixabay

The holidays are stressful enough without also considering the difficulty of finding the perfect gift for your roomies, especially if you feel the pressure to get it right. Whether your roomie is an expert gift-giver or you really just want to step-up your gift-giving game this year, you can breathe a sigh of relief.

Not only will these 10, budget-friendly gifts be a great starting off point when considering what to get your roomie, but you’ll also be able to take care of everyone else on your list, with plenty of time to spare before the holidays.

Just make sure you start ideation and shopping now; the holidays are approaching even faster than you may think, and the perfect gift isn’t going to sit on the shelf forever!

Happy shopping (and Happy Holidays) to all!

How to Celebrate the Holidays With Your Roommates When You’re Different Religions

By Alyssa Laffitte

The holiday season is coming up, so it’s almost time to celebrate! However, as a college student, you are likely sharing a room with people of different backgrounds and religions. Part of the college experience is learning to live and work alongside a diverse group of people. The holidays are not an exception to that! In this article, we’ll discuss celebrating the holidays with your roommate when you are different religions.

Image via Pexels

Put up multiple different decorations

Decorations are a big part of the holiday season. For example, many people think of a Christmas tree or a Menorah when they think of the holidays. A good way to include all your roommates in your holiday celebrations, allow everyone to put up their own decorations. Not only will it be beautiful to have all those decorations up, but it will also be a way to make sure everyone is represented. Just make sure everyone has an equal amount of space since you don’t want one person’s decorations taking over the entire room. You can even go shopping for the decorations together, that way you can choose colors that won’t clash with each other. Shopping for decorations together is also a good way to make sure everyone is on board with the decorations that will be up since you wouldn’t want to make anyone uncomfortable with decorations in their own living room (since it’s their living room, too!). One way to celebrate the holidays with your roommates of a different religion is to put up multiple decorations.

Be respectful of your roommates

Of course, this is a good rule to follow all year long, but please remember during the holiday season to be respectful of your roommates. Living with others involves compromise, and the holiday season is no exception. As long as things are fair and you are respectful to each other, you can have a fun holiday season.

Include your roommates in your celebrations

Another way to celebrate the holidays with your roommates is to include them in your celebrations. It’s a sweet gesture to ask your roommate if they would like to help you wrap presents or participate in something like a gift exchange or a Passover meal. Even if they decline, it still shows that you want to involve them in your celebrations. An invitation is a way to include your roommate, that you want them there even if they do things differently. It’s a great way to make memories and to celebrate this wonderful time of the year! In other words, you should definitely invite your roommates to participate in your holiday celebrations.

Join in your roommate’s celebrations

Conversely, if your roommate invites you to join in their holiday traditions, you should definitely accept! Participating in your roommate’s holiday celebration will not only educate you on how different religions celebrate holidays, but it will also help build your friendship with your roommate. It shows that you care about them and their traditions, which is a nice quality to have in a roommate. Plus, it will be fun to try something new as you celebrate the holidays. Part of going to college and living with a roommate is expanding your horizons and making friends. Accepting your roommate’s invitation to participate in their holiday celebrations is the perfect way to do both. In short, if your roommate invites you to participate in their holiday celebrations, accept the invitation!

Cook different types of food for the holiday dinner

Besides decoration, food is a big part of the holidays. For this reason, you and your roommate could cook different types of food to celebrate your respective holidays You and your roommate could cook different holiday foods and share them together. Eating typical food from the holiday your roommate celebrates is another way to participate in their celebrations (as I mentioned earlier in the article, participating in celebrations shows your roommate that you care). If you don’t want to cook a full meal, you can just opt for something more simple and likely to please everyone: baking cookies! If you want to celebrate the holidays with your roommate of a different religion, you can cook different holiday foods or bake desserts together!

Start new traditions together

Finally, another way to celebrate the holidays with your roommate of a different religion is to start new traditions together. You could borrow ideas from both of your religions and traditions, or you could do something completely different. When you create traditions together, everyone will feel included and involved. For that reason, you can decide to start new holiday traditions with your roommates.

In summary, it’s easy to celebrate the holidays with your roommates of different religions. As long as you are respectful of each other, you should have a great holiday. You never know if it will be a way to bond with your roommate!

5 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Coordinate Decor with Your Roommate

By Naomi Fink

Moving into a dorm room or an apartment with someone else can be an exciting step in your journey toward independence. It’s also a great opportunity to decorate your room the way you’ve always wanted to. There’s just one catch: if you have a roommate, then your room isn’t only your room; it belongs to both you and your roommate. This means that the way you decorate your room isn’t entirely up to you. While getting in touch with your roommate to talk about color schemes and room themes may be a good place to start, coordinating the finer aesthetic details of your room together may not be the best idea. In fact, here are five reasons why you shouldn’t coordinate decor with your roommate.

1.  You may not agree on what looks best

You and your roommate might have the same taste in music and movies but coordinating decor means the two of you need to agree on what looks best...and that might not happen. You might like green while your roommate prefers orange. You might like things to have a clean, contemporary look while your roommate is more into the old-fashioned, woodsy look. Either way, if you’re planning on coordinating decor with your roommate, then both of you need to be okay with each other’s sense of style and agree on each other’s purchases for the room.

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2. The room may not end up feeling very “you”

Even if you and your roommate approve of each other’s styles, the way the room turns out may end up feeling like a compromise. By extension, this may feel somewhat inauthentic. If you’re purchasing new items for your room, you want them to be representative of you! The way you decorate your room can be an expression of your personality, likes, and dislikes. Unless you and your roommate are truly on the same page about everything, it may be worth it to split the room in half and allow each of you to decorate your side as you see fit. Another realistic thing to consider is the fact that you and your roommate are probably not going to be roommates forever. You may be okay with compromising on decor for a semester but odds are you aren’t going to want to buy all new decor again next year if you get a new roommate or choose to live alone. Make sure you’re happy with your purchases independent of your roommate so that if/when you go your separate ways, you still have the things you like best and that feel most you.

3. You may have different price ranges

Regardless of what styles you and your roommate might like or which specific items feel authentically you, there’s still the ever-pressing question of what you can afford. If you and your roommate come from different socioeconomic backgrounds or simply have different views about what prices are reasonable and what items are “worth it,” it may be a good idea not to coordinate decor. As college students, many of us feel that cheaper is better, but this isn’t always the case. If your roommate is pushing for something beyond your price range or wants to purchase something of sub-par quality just because the price is right, then it may be a sign that coordinating decor is not the right course of action for the two of you. There are enough roommate issues to figure out and talk through without arguing over the monetary aspect of decor choices.

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4. Coordinating is a hassle

Let’s say you and your roommate have similar price ranges and tastes in decor. It should be easy to coordinate decor then, right? Wrong. Coordinating can still be a hassle, especially if one of you is more of a planner than the other. For example, your roommate may see something in the store that they think would look great in your room and buy it on impulse. Meanwhile, you may have spent half an hour researching top brands and getting lost in the never-ending rabbit hole of Amazon reviews in an attempt to purchase the same item. The above is more of a communication issue than anything else but it’s still something to consider. Do you really want to check in with your roommate about every purchase you’re thinking about making? Not everyone takes coordination to this extreme, but in general, coordinating with your roommate can end up being more hassle than the aesthetic of your room is worth. Pick out decor that you like and that works with your finances; you’ll have plenty of other things (class schedules, sleep habits, guest policies, etc) to coordinate with your roommate as the semester goes on.

5. What you end up buying might clash

One final reason against coordinating with your roommate is that even if you manage to compromise on decor styles, agree on prices, and go through the logistical hassle of coordinating, the things you purchase may still end up clashing. In fact, the likelihood of this happening is pretty high unless you and your roommate shop for each item together. Colors look a lot different in person than they do online or over FaceTime. Avoid clashing by opting for a general color scheme or room theme instead of trying to coordinate all of your decor with your roommate. Having a roommate and decorating your dorm room or apartment can both be wonderful things, but perhaps the logistics of each should be kept somewhat separate. Communicate with your roommate and make sure to be true to yourself in values, boundaries, and decor!

5 Ways to Celebrate Thanksgiving With Your Roommates

By Alicia Geigel

It’s officially November, which means embracing the chilly fall temperatures, having some pretty photoshoots, and of course, preparing for Thanksgiving! Though it’s only the beginning of the month, many people, like myself, start preparing for the holiday now.

Thanksgiving practically dictates all of the November month, just as Halloween does in October and Christmas does in December. For nearly everyone in the US, Thanksgiving means enjoying time with friends and family, celebrating the numerous blessings of the year, watching football, and of course, enjoying a marvelous feast of delicious food.

This year, the Thanksgiving holiday falls amongst some stressful and unusual times. Due to the coronavirus pandemic, many people are unsure how to go about celebrating the special day with their dear friends and loved ones. Officials across several states have issued different recommendations for those who are planning to gather on the holiday, such as socially isolating for two weeks beforehand, limiting the number of those you are gathering with, and wearing masks when possible, depending on your location.

If you’re cooped up on campus with your roommates during fall break, you can still have a great Thanksgiving, and in fact, you should according to Krystine Batcho, Ph.D. and Professor of Psychology at Le Moyne College. She notes, "It isn’t just fun to interact with other people, it is essential to well-being to maintain healthy social connections. During the period of social isolation imposed by the pandemic, indicators of anxiety, depression, and feelings of hopelessness have increased. By prioritizing relationships, holidays strengthen prosocial emotions and behaviors, including compassion, empathy, forgiveness, and altruism.”

Though it may not be your usual gathering, there are several fun things to do with your roommates to enjoy the holiday and spend time together. Here are just a few ways to kick back with your roommates this Thanksgiving!

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1. Make the Meal Together: So much of what is nice about Thanksgiving is spending time with the people we cherish. Though we are used to seeing our roommates on a daily basis, taking the time to thoroughly enjoy each other’s company makes all the difference. What way to spend time with your roommates than to prepare the Thanksgiving feast together? Every roommate can be assigned a dish to make, like a hearty stuffing, creamy green bean casserole, or delectable macaroni and cheese, while perhaps one or two roommates tackle the turkey (or whichever your household preference is). Collectively making food together is a great bonding experience, and boy is it rewarding when it’s time to sit down and eat.
2. Break Out the Game Collection: In the chaos of everyday life, unfortunately there often isn’t enough time to simply let loose and revert to some of our beloved childhood fun. While the turkey is getting juicy in the oven and the kitchen is cleaned up, break out your game collection to play with the roommates. Get some chill music going, light candles, and try not to be too competitive playing an intense game of Uno or Monopoly with your roommates. Fun like this doesn’t require much and gives you all an opportunity to further bond together!
3. Enjoy the Parades, Virtually: Thanksgiving often is associated with food and family, but we can’t forget about the parades too! The iconic Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, local parades, and of course, the Purina Dog Show are all important events to enjoy on the holiday. Due to the coronavirus pandemic, there will most likely be a limited amount of people allowed to attend the event in person, so watching the parade from home is not only a safe option but a fun one as well! Everyone can pick their favorite floats, favorite pups, and appreciate one of the country’s greatest traditions.
4. Share What You Are Grateful For: A lot of us get distracted by the food, the fun, and the friends during Thanksgiving, and while all of that matters, what matters the most is remembering what we are grateful for. 2020 has been a rough year for all of us, and while there are plenty of things we wish we would change about the year, there are so many things to be grateful for. Gather all the roommates around, have each person write 3 things they are grateful for, and take turns sharing and reflecting on the good in their lives. Doing so can further uplift us all and set a great mood for the day!
5. Share the Love With Others, The No Contact Way: If you and your roommates are looking for a way to give back this Thanksgiving holiday, consider donating canned goods and non-perishable items to a local food pantry or church! Additionally, if you or your roommates cannot see loved ones due to the pandemic, considering collectively preparing a meal or meals and delivering it to their door for a contactless way of showing love.

 

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While this Thanksgiving will certainly be unlike any other we have experienced in our lifetime, there are still ways to enjoy the holiday and even establish some new traditions along the way!

Home Office Setups That Work When Living with Roommates

By Victoria Robertson

Living with roommates can pose several challenges, especially when considering a work from home situation. As many of us face remote work, it’s important to ensure you have a space set up that can accommodate your busy schedule, whether or not you have roommates.

So as we struggle through the difficult times, we can at the very least ensure that our home office set-ups are conducive for productivity, despite living with one or more other people. So, to help you get your home office set up, here are some setups that work when living with roommates.

Photo Via: Pixabay

1. Bedroom Office

When working from home, it’s typically best to choose a quiet location from which you can get the most work possible done. If at all possible, it’s best to set up a desk in your room that you strictly use for work (whether homework or professionally).

You can get as fancy or minimalist as possible with this setup, the main purpose is to have a distraction-free zone from which you can work without risk of being interrupted by a roommate in passing.

If you set up a bedroom office, just make sure you are minimizing the distractions, so the room shouldn’t have a TV (or at least, you shouldn’t turn it on during the day) and you should dedicate the desk space to your work, specifically so as not to impact your sleep schedule.

2. Shared Office

If you and your roommates all work, you could consider a shared office situation. This can be done in a number of ways. First, you could all use the same office at the same time. This solution works if you are all self-motivated and able to work (undistracted) in an environment where you’re surrounded by others.

Second, you could take turns using the office, depending on your schedules. For instance, if you work on different days of the week, you could switch off using the office. Otherwise, you could share the office to use for important Zoom meetings or other important situations, and use a different shared space when it’s in use.

3. Portable Desk

If you happen to live in a small apartment, don’t have room in your bedroom for an office, or simply prefer to work in comfort from your bed or the couch, you could get a portable desk setup.

Most people simply work from their laptops, so getting a portable desk that fits on your lap can make you slightly more comfortable, and offer a space for you to hold a cup of coffee or pen and notebook, depending on what you need for the day.

4. Balcony/Outdoor Setup

If you’re lucky enough to live in a state with warmer weather, it may be an option to get an outdoor setup for your workspace. While you should account for noise pollution, especially if you have an abundance of video conferences and calls, if you strictly work on documents, spreadsheets, or anything else throughout the day that doesn’t require talking to other people, outdoor setups can be relaxing and make you more productive.

This could be as simple as setting up a table and working from there every once in a while, or bringing your portable desk outside on nice days. Obviously, this isn’t an everyday solution, dependent upon the weather, but when it’s an option, it’s one that you’ll want to take advantage of.

5. The Library

Last, but not least, there is always the ‘ol reliable option: the library. Whether this means the campus library or the local library, you can always bring your items with you and set up there.

Again, if you have a lot of calls or conferences, this may not be the ideal setup. However, if you don’t, then this is a great way to maintain some normalcy, as you can essentially get up and ready as if you’re going through your normal commute, all while going down the street to get some work done in a quiet setting.

And as previously stated, this option doesn’t have to be your everyday plan, but if you have a lot to accomplish throughout the day and are worried about the distractions at home, this is an amazing option.

Working from home, whether in terms of school work, an internship, or a professional occupation, is a challenge, especially when living with roommates. So rather than diminish productivity by working from a setup that prevents you from getting any work done, you can instead create a workspace that helps you to be as productive as possible.

The above setups are perfect for getting your work done, regardless of your living situation. It comes down to this: figure out what makes you the most productive, and ensure that it’s reflected in your office setup. Then, nothing will be able to stop you!

How to Deal When You and Your Roommates Have Different Political Views

By Kaitlin Hurtado

If you are living with roommates, you are more than likely to disagree on a variety of topics — What does “clean” really mean? How often can someone stay the night without it becoming invasive? While it’s not super comfortable to come into disagreement with your roommates, it is to be expected when multiple individuals are constantly in close quarters. However, some topics are a lot more tension-inducing between roommates, take politics for example.

Whether your roommate is a close friend or not, there is always the chance that you and your roommates will have different political views. One roommate may be liberal, but another roommate may be conservative. One may be completely detached from politics while another makes politics an integral part of their lives. Varying political views — whatever they may be — can create plenty of tension between roommates.

With the 2020 election drawing closer and closer, these tensions are likely to arise when you and your roommates have different political views. While you may have brushed the topic under the rug before, it may be more difficult to ignore now. Here are tips on how to deal when you and your roommates have different political views.

Photo: Pexels

Maintain Respect for One Another

Regardless of how well you and your roommates get along without politics in the picture, placing you both in a conversation about politics can morph you into nothing more than bickering strangers. At the end of the day, everyone has a right to their own views, and a right to vote. Despite what you believe in when it comes to politics, that is one thing you share with your roommates above all. So, even when you could not be more different when it comes to who you are voting for, what policies you stand for, and so on, each person has a right to believe what they believe in — no matter how wrong you find it personally.

Remember this whenever you find yourself conflicted about you and your roommates’ political views. If you and your roommate were friends prior to living together, or have become close because you live together, you should try to not let your political views invade your friendship. However, for some people, this may be a deal-breaker in personal relationships. Some topics, like reproductive rights and immigration, are way more personal for some individuals, but other topics like the economy feel more impersonal. These differences can cause a friendship-breaking rift, or inspire new boundaries between you and your roommate.

If you and your roommates were brought together by a random rooming assignment, or just have no relationship outside of living together, contrasting political views can definitely be more impactful on your personal relationship with them as you do not really have a personal view of them outside of their politics. There are no years of close friendship and memories to cushion that dislike you may have for their conflicting politics, so you may find yourself quicker to be angry or abrasive when it comes to your differing political views. If this is the case, you may consider just agreeing to disagree on politics for the sake of maintaining a neutral setting in your living space.

If you do find yourself discussing politics with your roommate, whether intentionally or unintentionally, remain calm and respectful. Just imagine how you would feel if someone was angrily yelling at you for your political views — why would you put your roommate in that undesirable position? Keep reading for tips on navigating conversations about politics between you and your roommates.

While you may have political views that differ, remember you are sharing your living space, and are both paying to live in that space. That being said, sometimes it is okay to push politics aside to ensure that you are both living in a space that is healthy and safe for one another.

Photo: Pexels

Keep Living/Common Spaces Neutral

As mentioned above, everyone has a right to feel safe, healthy, and happy in their living spaces. That being said, you do not want to shove your political views down your throat by decorating your shared spaces with political gear. While navigating common areas to suit everyone’s tastes is tricky enough, you definitely do not want to hang a flag for one presidential candidate in your living room when you are fully aware that your roommate supports another candidate. If you have access to your own yard, do not take election season as an opportunity to rile up your roommates by placing a yard sign endorsing a candidate that your roommate does not agree with.

On that same note, do not put up decorations that put down your roommates’ political views. This can mean posters that dump on the candidate they support or degrade their political party. This is all pretty self-explanatory, but can further help keep your living space a neutral zone.

Navigating the Road to Understanding Your Roommate

While you may not necessarily want to understand or take on your roommate’s contrasting political views, it may be worth it to understand where they are coming from. College is a pivotal time in many young people’s lives. Itis likely their first step being away from home and the setting that molded them into the person you know and are living with today.

That being said, it’s important to understand that their upbringing more than likely has a large influence in shaping how they behave and think, such as what political views they hold. Just because your roommate came from a primarily affluent, conservative area, does not mean that they hold all the political views typically associated with that area. Or vice versa. Your roommate’s culture and identity are also other integral factors that have shaped the political views they hold.

Do not let certain stereotypes influence the way you interact with your roommate, ever. Trying to understand where your roommate comes from can also allow you to identify what it is exactly you both are clashing on politically. Does it come from an uneducated viewpoint? If so, you may have come into the perfect opportunity to help them learn more about a certain topic.

Accept You’re in No Position to Force Change

Understanding where your roommate is coming from may help many when it comes to accepting that they and their roommates have differing political views. However, for some, they see it as an opening for an opportunity to change their roommates’ views. This is often a giant roommate clash waiting to happen.

Some roommates may take the chance to humor you as you try to change their views, but others may see it as an attack. For them, it is an example of you ignoring their right to their own beliefs and a show of disrespect. Remember that you are in no position to force your roommate to change, just as your roommate is in no position to force you to change your political views and adopt their political views. The age-old saying of “Treat others as you would want to be treated” is key in situations like these.

Discuss Politics Safely and Set Boundaries

You likely will feel the effects of having a roommate with contrasting political views as the election creeps closer, and even amid the aftermath of the election. Politics are more likely than ever to come up, whether it be a roommate streaming a debate or someone discussing the election on the news, it should not come as a surprise to see politics more and more in everyday situations. This means that the neutral zone you and your roommate agreed on may be jeopardized.

Approach any politics-based conversation with caution — be respectful, calm — and try to be neutral. It may just be a matter of saying what was said on the news and leaving it at just that. Those sly comments you want to mutter under your breath or as you walk away? Avoid them. Do not purposely fan the flames, even if you are getting negative energy from your roommate as well.

If you do decide to discuss politics with your roommates, take it as a learning opportunity. It will hardly be the last time you encounter someone with conflicting political views. There will always be classmates, coworkers, and complete strangers you will find yourself disagreeing with when it comes to politics. Talk to your roommates respectfully, learn what their viewpoint is, have a bit of respectful back and forth (find something to agree on, pinpoint where it differs), and move on.

When in doubt, stick to what you know. Meaning, don’t just throw your opinion out continuously in hopes it outweighs any argument. Present facts over opinions to avoid the conversation straying too far from neutral. Your roommate may still react negatively to the facts you present, but they will not be able to deny that they are factual instead of just an opinion. Sticking to facts during your political conversations can help immensely when it comes to keeping everyone somewhat neutral and comfortable throughout the conversation. On the positive side, focusing on facts will also help everyone learn more about the topic being discussed rather than focusing on their emotions.

If you are the one to take the wrong step and lash out during a conversation about politics, be the bigger person, even if it is definitely easier said than done. Pause the conversation, take a deep breath, and apologize for your outburst. This may be the time to take a break from the discussion or a turning point to a different topic. The moment anyone in the conversation stops being civil is the moment the conversation turns toxic and unproductive. It is important for everyone to be able to recognize this shift and know when to leave the conversation be and agree to disagree.

Just like any touchy topic between roommates — hosting parties, having significant others over — remember to set boundaries. Everyone may be feeling more than a little overwhelmed at the current political climate they are facing in different areas of their life such as school, work, family back home, or social media. Their living space may just be their safe haven to take a much-needed mental break.

Have a sit-down with your roommates and discuss how you are going to handle the elections (or any politics for that matter). Are you having any major televised event live-streamed in the common area? Can you discuss what is going on in the election/results? Would you like to avoid anything related to politics in your conversations with your roommates? These boundaries can be pivotal in keeping the peace between roommates, especially with an election around the corner.

Take Politics Where You Feel Safe

While you may not necessarily feel comfortable discussing politics with your roommates due to your conflicting political views, do not rob yourself of the opportunity to engage in conversations about politics. As a college student, you have plenty of resources where you can connect with individuals and/or groups that hold similar political views to you. There are typically clubs or organizations that are for students, both Democrat and Republican.

You also do not have to necessarily seek out a politics-based organization to have conversations about politics. Reach out to friends who have similar political views to you to feel safer when it comes to political conversations. If you live in on-campus housing where there are common spaces to meet with students, try seeing if anyone else would like to discuss a debate or town hall so you can engage in a more neutral setting in a bigger group in a space such as a dorm common room.

At the end of the day, living with roommates can be tough for just about anyone. Adding politics into the conversation can be messy for anyone, roommates or not. Combine the two, and you may just find yourself in a disaster.

Remember to stay civil and respectful of each other — you both have a right to the space and to believe whatever you want to believe. Set and stick to your boundaries to keep everyone comfortable in their own living space.

Tips for Apartment Hunting With Roommates

By Alyssa Laffitte

Apartment hunting is even more fun when you’re doing it with friends! It’s exciting to picture yourself and your best friends living in a cute three-bedroom apartment. However, when you apartment hunt with other people, there needs to be clear communication and agreement every step of the way. Here are some tips to help you apartment hunt when you already have your roommates.

Image via Isorepublic.com

Make sure everyone is on the same page

When you are looking for an apartment with roommates, you need to make sure everyone is on the same page in many areas. For example, you must be on the same page when it comes to budget, location, and rules for living in the apartment. It would be a good idea to have a meeting with all the new roommates to discuss these things. You can make decisions, as a group, during this meeting. When everyone communicates clearly and is on the same page, there will be fewer arguments.

Discuss everyone’s rental history

When multiple people live in an apartment, the potential landlord will look at each tenant’s credit history. Before you decide for sure who will live in the apartment, all your potential roommates need to be transparent about their rental history, since rental and credit history could affect your rent amount, or it could even cause your apartment application to be rejected. You will want to know these things before you start applying for apartments with your roommates. It would be a good idea for all roommates to know these things about each other: Did they have any problems with their previous property manager? Do they have bad credit that might cause the apartment application to be rejected? Have they had problems paying their share of rent in the past? This will be a hard conversation to have, but it’s important to be aware of any potential problems that might come up during the application process.

Set a budget

Of course, one of the most important discussions roommates need to have is about finances. You all need to decide together how much you are willing to pay for household expenses like rent, electricity, gas, water, trash removal, heating/cooling, Internet, and cable. You can easily search online to find out what reasonable rates for these utilities are in your area, and decide an amount from there. To keep things crystal clear, make sure each roommate knows the amount they would be responsible for paying each month. You can also discuss if you’re willing to go over your budget (and by how much) to get a better place. Figuring out a budget with all your potential roommates is a great starting point when looking for an apartment.

Keep a shared spreadsheet of potential places

Since there will be multiple people involved in this apartment search, it might be a good idea to keep track of the places you are interested in. You and your roommates could set up a shared spreadsheet (all roommates should have access to edit it) with potential apartments. More specifically, you can include apartment address, monthly rent, any amenities, and which utilities (if any) are included in the rent. If you go see the apartment, you can also include your impressions of the place and of the property manager. This will help you keep track of which apartments you like and which you have already looked at. It will also be a good visual reference for how much money you will be spending and the types of apartments that are available. Making sure the spreadsheet is shareable is a great way to make sure all your roommates can have access to it and can add places, too.

Make sure everyone understands the terms of the lease

Before anyone signs a leasing agreement, they should read it thoroughly and understand what it says. Many people don’t understand their agreement because it is usually a long, dry, and boring legal document. However, it’s important to understand your lease. Here is a list of things you should definitely know:

  • What utilities are included in the rent?
  • What happens if you need to break your lease?
  • What happens if a roommate doesn’t pay their share of the rent? (This might not be outlined in the leasing agreement, because issues between roommates are not the property manager’s problem. However, it would still be a good question to discuss as you draft a roommate agreement, more on that later in the article.)
  • What happens if a roommate unexpectedly leaves, or needs to be kicked out of the apartment? (Again, this might not be outlined in the leasing agreement, but should definitely be discussed. Even if you and your roommates get along really well, and you’re positive they would never leave unexpectedly, it’s still a good idea to have a plan in case it does happen.)
  • How does your property manager accept rent money? (Can you pay online with a credit card, or are only paper checks accepted?)
  • Are pets allowed?
  • What is the parking policy?

Although the above list is not exhaustive by any means, it’s a good guideline for lease rules that each roommate should understand.

Decide your “non-negotiables” together

When looking for an apartment, there are certain things you can do without (for example, some people are okay with not having a dishwasher). However, there are some things that are absolutely not negotiable (for example, if you have a car, parking is a must-have!). These “non-negotiables” will be different depending on the person. When you meet with your roommates, discuss what everyone’s non-negotiables are. Discuss together and come up with a final, master list of things your apartment must absolutely have. This list will guide you and your roommates as you search for an apartment that meets everyone’s needs.

Check out the neighborhood together

A great way to spend time with your roommates and to familiarize yourself with a potential new area is to simply check out a new neighborhood together! After you go to see an apartment, it would be a good idea to walk or drive around the neighborhood for a little bit. A walk around the neighborhood will show you what the “vibe” is like in the area. This is important because you don’t want to live in a bad neighborhood. This could be the deciding factor between one apartment and another, so pay attention to the vibe of the neighborhood!

Additionally, a walk around the neighborhood will give you a chance to explore any restaurants or stores in the area. (Bonus points if there’s a coffee shop near your new apartment!) You might just find your new favorite place to eat or shop.

Of course, if you can’t physically go and check out the neighborhood, you can at least check out the area on Google Maps or Street View to check out what’s nearby.

As you look for an apartment with your roommates, it’s important to learn about the area you might be living in. Walking or driving around the neighborhood is a good way to do this.

Read reviews for multiple apartment complexes

Some apartment complexes have reviews online. If you do a quick search for the name of the apartment complex and the word “reviews”, you will likely find something helpful. You should spend time reading the reviews of the apartments you are interested in. This way, you can read what other tenants have to say about living in that particular apartment complex. Reviews are helpful because tenants are usually very honest about the pros and cons of their living situation. Reading these comments can guide you to which apartment would best suit you and your roommates. (Bonus points if you and your roommates can all read the reviews together!)

Draft a roommate contract

For any roommate situation, it would be a good idea for all the roommates to get together and draft a roommate contract. This contract will outline the expectations the roommates have for each other. For example, it should mention things like expectations for things like overnight guests (how much advance notice should be given? Is there a limit to how many days guests can stay over? What about significant others?). Here are more examples of things that should be mentioned in a roommate contract:

  • What food items are shared? What items do you need to ask for permission to eat?
  • What’s the policy on borrowing personal belongings, like an item of clothing or a hair straightener?
  • Who will ensure that all the bills get paid? How will everyone send in their share of the rent?
  • How will you divide the chores?
  • Any quiet hours that should be respected?
  • How will you resolve any conflicts that come up?
  • What will happen if one roommate doesn’t pay their share of the rent, or unexpectedly moves out?

Having these policies in writing will protect you and your roommates. It will serve as a guideline for how you guys will live together.

Consult the Internet

Now that you know what kind of apartment you and your roommates are looking for, and you have a budget and a target neighborhood, you can start looking for apartments. One of the easiest ways to find an apartment nowadays is to look online. There are many websites you can use to find a place. Some of these websites might even have reviews from tenants, as I mentioned before. The Internet is a great way to start your apartment search.

Don’t pay for more than you need

As you and your roommate discuss your negotiables and your non-negotiables, you should also make sure you don’t pay for more than you need. A place that has many amenities will likely cost more money. If you don’t need many amenities, choose a place with fewer amenities, as this will save you money. Again, which amenities you need is a topic you should discuss with your roommates.

Decide how you will deal with bigger rooms

Another important topic to discuss with your roommates before you move in is how you will deal with rooms of different sizes, or if one room is the master bedroom. First, you should discuss who will get the bigger room. Then, you should discuss the difference in how much they should pay in rent and utilities. Of course, the main question is: how much more? This is a topic that should be discussed beforehand and should be agreed upon by everyone. Again, everyone should know how much they should expect to contribute to housing expenses every month.

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Decide how bills will be paid

After deciding how the bills will be split among the roommates, it’s also important to decide how they will be paid. For example, will one person be responsible for making sure rent is paid, while the other person makes sure the utilities are paid? Or will one person be in charge of sending in the payments for all the bills? Will you need to send the money via Venmo or Zelle to this person? How far in advance of the bill due date will you need to do this? What happens if someone can’t pay their share? These are all important questions that need to be addressed before you start paying bills.

Getting an apartment with your friends is a lot of fun. Still, when you leave with roommates, it’s important to set clear, ground rules from the start. (If you are already good friends with your roommates, some people would say it’s even MORE important to set these rules.) When these rules are in place, everyone will know their responsibilities and what to expect from the other roommates.

The first thing you should do when you decide to get an apartment with your friends is to discuss what everyone wants or needs in a living space. For example, what neighborhood does everyone want to live in? What amenities do people need? Will they need a parking spot or a pet-friendly place? You should also set a budget for each of your housing expenses, not just rent. Make sure everyone is on the same page with what they can afford. Once you do this, you’re ready to start looking for your place! The Internet is a great place to start looking. If you find a place that interests you, check out the neighborhood together. When you’re sure you want to apply for that apartment, take a look at the leasing agreement and ensure you (and your roommates) agree with everything written there. In doing these things, you should have a smooth time finding an apartment with your roommates.